Let’s take a look at some behaviours we will encounter in the Parks.

Remember, though, all of these are behaviours that other people don’t realize they are doing. It is best to respond with kindness and grace - even though that can be really hard to do.

Smoking

I know what you’re thinking. “How can you unintentionally smoke? That doesn’t seem possible.”

And… you would be right. You can’t unintentionally smoke. Well, I guess you could, if you were sitting around a campfire and were really not paying attention. But that is highly unlikely to happen during your visit to Disneyland Paris. They tend to frown on campfires in the Parks. You can, however, intentionally smoke and be oblivious to the effect this has on those around you.

To some of you reading this, you may wonder why we are talking about this at all. I mean, smoking is becoming a thing of the past, right? The percentage of people smoking is going down year over year and is nowhere as high as it was even 20 years ago, right? Right?

Nope.

Welcome to Europe, my friends, where smoking is, sadly, still very common. Which means that second-hand smoke is similarly very common. And this second-hand smoke can quite easily add more sensory inputs onto our already saturated brains, making doing, well, anything in the Parks that much more difficult.

It can be a medical issue.

Also, if you happen to be like me and Expansion Pack 2 and have asthma, this is more than an inconvenience: it can be a medical issue. Knowing where the first aid buildings are, as well as a few of the more out of the way secret spots in the Parks can be incredibly helpful here. Because many other people don’t know about these spots, we can tuck ourselves away and enjoy (relatively) fresh air until we feel confident in going out and braving the madding crowd yet again.

And yes, I know, there are many designated smoking spots within the Parks. It is just that while these are present and able to be used (and are used by many guests), there are always some guests who believe that the rules don’t actually apply to them – only to other people. These particular guests will happily smoke next to newborn children (I wish I were making this up, but I’m not) and light up a cigarette or e-cigarette within a crowded area. A crowded area such as the designated priority viewing area or priority queue.

When this happens, remind yourself that Disneyland Paris has already thought about this happening, and that Cast Members are able to remind smoking guests to extinguish their cigarettes and to move to a designated smoking section. This option is only available, however, when there is an available Cast Member. Otherwise, our options are limited to us asking the person to move to a designated smoking area or for us to move to a different location. I’ve done both of these. If we take the first option, just remember to be respectful and approach it as a reminder about the Parks rules that apply to everyone. I’ve only had one instance where someone challenged me on this, and other guests nearby chimed in to ask them to stop smoking there as well – and they did.

Stopping in the middle of the road to check a map. Or for no reason at all.

We can’t control other people. We can control our reactions.

This one really gets my proverbial goat. I know I have to stop and take my deep breaths when this happens, and it happens all of the time. To me, the most frustrating part of someone stopping in the middle of the way is how easy it is to avoid doing this.

Whenever someone stops in the middle of the path to check their phone (and let’s be honest here, it is most likely the app map they are looking at), it causes a big pile up behind them and often results in people bumping into each other or getting stuck in a place where they can’t move at all until the original sudden-stoppers move out of the way. And this can be a really intense moment for those of us living with neurodiverse brains. The sudden nature of the contact, the closeness of the other people, the restriction in movement: all of these can serve to rocket our stress levels up towards their maximum limit.

And this doesn’t have to happen at all! We all get lost. We all need to stop and take stock of our surroundings and to find our next path. But we don’t need to do it in the middle of a crowded walkway jammed with stressed people all trying to go in contradictory directions.

And yet, while we can’t control other people, we can control ourselves. All we can do is to move around them when we can, and let the inconsiderate behaviour go. Oh, and to set a good example by simply moving over to the side of the path whenever we need to get out the app map or grab some pocket candy.

Littering

Neurodiverse people can feel upset when other people don’t follow the rules.

This one is just frustrating. Disneyland has more garbage cans than the nation of Andorra does. There really is no reason that people can’t put their refuse in the bin.

And yet… it still happens. The best thing to do when you notice this is to alert a Cast Member if there is a bigger mess. There are always lots of Cast Members about (in area-appropriate clothing, no less) who keep the streets and pathways very clean.

The main reason that I’m even mentioning this here is that rule-following usually accompanies neurodiversity, and seeing others break the rules can be triggering in the same way as a fear of getting in trouble ourselves. This is the case for one of the Expansion Packs, so we often have conversations about how our bodies react to things in ways that other people’s don’t. Which sometimes reassures and sometimes doesn’t. We have found that if we know that the Cast Members are vigilant in their task of keeping the streets clean and tidy, it helps to reduce our stress whenever we see someone littering. And hopefully you can use this bit of information in the same way, if needed.

Oh, and I’m not actually sure that Disneyland Paris has more garbage cans than Andorra does. Andorra actually has quite a lot of garbage cans and is very clean. We never had a problem finding a garbage can when we needed one. Andorra is just smaller in size than other nearby European countries, so it made for an amusing, if inaccurate, analogy. For all those Andorrans reading this: you keep being your friendly, high altitude-adjusted selves!

Lack of a volume setting

Don’t forget your ear protection!

Remember how Disneyland Paris is loud? Well, that applies to other people as well!

I get how this happens. Other people have their volume settings set higher than we do, much of the time. Especially for those of us who are more sensitive to sounds than others are. Which, if you haven’t picked up on this fact yet, would be me. But that is just how they are! And we are all different.

That, plus with Disneyland Paris being loud generally, people tend to have to speak over the ambient noise to be heard, making the ambient noise that much louder. A bit of a positive feedback loop here, really.

There is no avoiding this one, sorry. Thankfully, all that prep work we did to make sure we have good ear protection with us pays off here, too. I’m just mentioning it here so that you can be prepared for when it happens. Even if we aren’t in a high-sensory part of the Parks, other people can be there and can affect us as well.

And maybe they are being loud because they need to be! Remember that we are all of us different, and, just like us, they may be neurodiverse or are otherwise facing challenges that are not always easily visible. And sometimes over-stimulation and being overwhelmed comes out as loud. Is this a helpful response? Nope. But it is an honest one, and usually not one that is under their full control. So, like with other behaviours that irritate us, we should, to the extent possible, try and give people the benefit of the doubt when they are being loud.

All that said, if there is a group of people talking really loudly in an enclosed space, you are definitely allowed to politely ask them to try and speak a little more quietly. 

General rudeness

We can often misinterpret cultural differences as rudeness.

Imagine this:

There you are, sitting on a bench in the middle of the Studios Park, excited about being in Disneyland and looking forward to some shawarma, when some random stranger sits down right next to you and starts speaking, excitedly and loudly, to you.

You were just minding your own business, making a plan, and all of a sudden you are forced to spend a bunch of energy trying to figure out what this person wants and why they are talking to you!

These sorts of interactions happen all of the time. And, to other people, they may be perfectly commonplace. There are a few reasons for this. Firstly, for the non-neurodivergent, these sorts of interactions don’t take up nearly as much energy as they do for us. They can have many of these sorts of conversations and hardly think about it! Strange, I know.

The other reason for this is cultural. Disneyland Paris attracts people from all over the world, and these people bring their cultures and expectations with them. And so do we. There are many aspects of a person’s culture that are readily visible, but there are also many cultural aspects which are not. For example, while it may be culturally appropriate, even expected, for you to engage in small talk with strangers where you are from, this can be considered quite rude in Paris. In fact, anything that can be considered to infringe on someone’s personal space, even smiling at a stranger, can be considered a faux pas.

Sometimes a small shift in perspective is all we need.

We can use this information in several ways. First, if someone comes up to us and starts talking to us out of the blue, we can confidently not engage with them and know that we aren’t being rude ourselves by doing so. They may still consider our actions to be rude, but that is their problem and not ours. We did our research! Second, we can enjoy our day in the Parks, confident in the knowledge that we aren’t being rude to other people if we choose not to talk with them. Unless they’re the people you came with. Don’t ignore them. They probably expect you to talk to them.

These cultural differences can crop up in all sorts of unexpected ways. Of course, not all rude behaviour we experience is a result of cultural differences. The unfortunate truth is that sometimes people are just rude. And, while unfortunate, there is again nothing we can do about it except to ignore it to the best of our abilities and move on. One little trick that I’ve developed to help me out in these situations, and which may similarly help you, is to try and imagine what other cultural norms might exist if the obviously rude behaviour was some sort of cultural expectation. This quickly gets ridiculous, and I often find myself chuckling and shaking my head in amusement at those poor people who have to live in such a place. Which, even if it doesn’t solve the problem, it makes me feel better.